I'm back.
Yup, I’ve returned from my former country and new head of operations that is "Glasgae".
I planned to pen a little bit of what my thoughts were on this city that is simultaneously fucking scary and pretty cool. Today though I plan to get drunk and slide tackle a Swan, so here as an update are some lookalikes.
I watched "In Bruges" last night. Absolutely brilliant film and possibly one of the best I've seen this year. Half way through the excellent Colin Farrell karate chops a racist dwarf in the neck. The reason I loved this was as soon as the poor little blighter landed on his compact sturdy little arse, I realised that I also wanted to karate chop a midget.
I love midgets; seriously they are absolutely fucking brilliant. Now I know this might sound slightly patronising and my "love" for these little people may seem like some sort of derogative view of what at its base roots is a medical condition, but in all honesty, they give me joy. Everytime I see one, my internal organs all start hugging each other and my brain turns into some kind of mushy happy glee yoghurt. I have some kind of unconscious need to grab one and squeeze him until he tells me how he gets money from the ATM. I yearn to have a dwarf buddy, I'd invite him to stay over and in the morning I'd sit at his bed quietly waiting for him to wake so I could wipe the sleep from his eyes and give him a collie bucky into the kitchen where a tiny cup of coffee is waiting for him... Decaf of course, as I wouldn’t want his tiny junked up little frame sliding from room to room as he desperately tried to lick all the wool jumpers we have. We'd talk about sport and the current issues affecting the verticly retarded demographic, and after we'd all go to the park to meet his tiny posse where like Gandalf, I would lead them on a merry adventure to the local H&M.
Anyway, the little Dwarf dude from the film looks uncannily like a tiny version of housewife’s favourite "Maaaatt Daaaamon".
Now everyones favourite Albino is still in the big brother and I know I kinda pick on him but to be honest if you're daft enough to go on a reality TV show your fair game for anyone. Well again Bec thought so and she called me to tell me he looked like a Weresheep from the Kiwi film "Black Sheep".
Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Yup, I’ve returned from my former country and new head of operations that is "Glasgae".
I planned to pen a little bit of what my thoughts were on this city that is simultaneously fucking scary and pretty cool. Today though I plan to get drunk and slide tackle a Swan, so here as an update are some lookalikes.
I watched "In Bruges" last night. Absolutely brilliant film and possibly one of the best I've seen this year. Half way through the excellent Colin Farrell karate chops a racist dwarf in the neck. The reason I loved this was as soon as the poor little blighter landed on his compact sturdy little arse, I realised that I also wanted to karate chop a midget.
I love midgets; seriously they are absolutely fucking brilliant. Now I know this might sound slightly patronising and my "love" for these little people may seem like some sort of derogative view of what at its base roots is a medical condition, but in all honesty, they give me joy. Everytime I see one, my internal organs all start hugging each other and my brain turns into some kind of mushy happy glee yoghurt. I have some kind of unconscious need to grab one and squeeze him until he tells me how he gets money from the ATM. I yearn to have a dwarf buddy, I'd invite him to stay over and in the morning I'd sit at his bed quietly waiting for him to wake so I could wipe the sleep from his eyes and give him a collie bucky into the kitchen where a tiny cup of coffee is waiting for him... Decaf of course, as I wouldn’t want his tiny junked up little frame sliding from room to room as he desperately tried to lick all the wool jumpers we have. We'd talk about sport and the current issues affecting the verticly retarded demographic, and after we'd all go to the park to meet his tiny posse where like Gandalf, I would lead them on a merry adventure to the local H&M.
Anyway, the little Dwarf dude from the film looks uncannily like a tiny version of housewife’s favourite "Maaaatt Daaaamon".
Now everyones favourite Albino is still in the big brother and I know I kinda pick on him but to be honest if you're daft enough to go on a reality TV show your fair game for anyone. Well again Bec thought so and she called me to tell me he looked like a Weresheep from the Kiwi film "Black Sheep".
Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
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